Marriage problems are and will always be a constant. Doesn’t matter if you just got married or if you have been married for 50 years. What matters is the way you deal with them. Here are list the most common problems in the marriage.
This problem is self-explanatory. Cheating; physical and emotional affairs; one night stands and internet relationships are ways of infidelity. They can happen for a lot of reasons. As a couple, you will struggle to find a solution for them.
Identify first the reasons for that to happen and then work on them.
Values And Beliefs
People grow to learn and believe different things. Core values and beliefs are the major differences that can happen to a marriage. They need to be discussed thoroughly before you get married.
For instance, in modern society, there are a lot of couples that don’t have the same religion. It is one of the biggest differences that can happen since you and your partner will want to teach the kids different things.
Stress is the one constant in today’s world. Anything can be a source of stress: money, work, family, illness. The way couples handle the stress can create even more stress. Taking time to discuss these issues in a calm environment is essential for breaking the circle.
Money can create every type of friction in a relationship. Being short of money can cause stress; having “your money” and “his money” can make you keep score of whom spends more or less money and on what it is being spent. Creating a financial plan will help you with this issue.
Lack Of Communication
Every single problem in a relationship comes from bad communication. According to Elaine Fantle Shimberg, author of Blending Families. “You can’t communicate while you’re checking your BlackBerry, watching TV, or flipping through the sports section,”
Take time away from distractions and make time to talk about what matters. Plus, it will make your spouse feel like you care about your marriage.
Expecting Your Partner To Fill in The Blanks
Think about this: why do you enter relationships? Why did you got married?
If the answer is love, respect, and trust, you are good to go. If you did it because you are expecting your partner to fill in all the blanks for you, you are headed for disaster.
Asking someone to be your everything is a big request. Instead of waiting for someone to complete yourself, you should work on it alone. Go into your marriage as someone that can stand on two feet by his/herself.
Assuming Every Conflict Will Lead To Divorce
Not everyone thinks the same so, you and your partner will have disagreements. Some of them will cause conflict. It is part of the relationship and there is nothing you can do except move on by either letting it go or finding a solution. Not every disagreement is grounds for divorce. And even those who are, won’t lead you to it if you are strong enough to battle through it.
When you are in a marriage, you are working as a team. You either win together or lose together. Keeping score will make you both miserable. You need to make decisions together and work on your relationship so it survives long term.
Expecting To Be Like Your Parents
Your parents have been working in their relationship for years. They are stable and know how to deal with the situations. It takes a lot of work as well as emotional and physical.
If you want to celebrate the big achievements, you will want to celebrate big time. Going away and putting yourself in debt is not worth the instant reward. Have patience and take your time.
Believing Love Is Enough
Love is never enough. Marriage is made off many variables and you need to know how to balance them the best way. Love is just a start and both of you need to be willing to open up to each other and give everything to your relationship.
Maybe, in your married life, you already have encountered these issues. How did you deal with them? Did it work? Be aware that if it worked this time it may not work the same way the next time. Don’t be afraid to find New Solutions and work on your problems differently. Find the solution that better suits you as a couple and be happy!